Growing up in a toxic family has its own set of hardships and struggles, and only someone who belongs to one of them will understand that well and truly.
For a very long time, the family structure was considered the most important unit of society. But in modern times, the family structure is gradually collapsing. We may not have many articles talking about this because the family business is still kept under wraps. How much we can deny it, but the family as a unit falls apart.
This only proves one thing a certain type of toxicity has entered this system. This toxicity may lead to pain and suffering for family members. More importantly, the victim of this toxicity may lead a life full of stress, anxiety, and insecurity. Toxicity can certainly make someone’s life completely toxic.
But we rarely address this issue. This is because of the sacred status given to the family as a temple. The mainstream media wants to portray the family as an indivisible unit of society. Because of this depiction, we forget to question the idea of family. When we forget to question structure, we know the following. Sometimes, we become victims of structure.
To avoid this, the first thing we must realize is that the family is not as sacred as it is said. Secondly, the family as a structure has its own set of problems and can cause these problems.
The most shocking part of this whole process is that sometimes we don’t realize that we are victims of the family structure. We still live our lives believing that all things that happen within the family are okay, without realizing that maybe the source of our insecurities and bad experiences sometimes is the family itself.
But our desire for love makes us forget the harm we are doing to ourselves. Ask familial poisoning victims. They will surely tell you a lot that they are having because of their so-called good family.
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Here are just four of the serious struggles that people who find themselves in a toxic family encounter face:
- Communication is difficult
If you are part of a toxic family, you will find it very difficult to relate to others. Why is this happening?
This is because the way we communicate depends entirely on what we learn at home. As humans learn by example, if at home you see that there is a severe communication breakdown, you will never be able to form connections outside the home. Thus, all of your interactions will be influenced by what you are going through at home.
Hence, people coming from a family where toxicity was high, would fail to communicate their usual thoughts, let alone feelings. This will surely create havoc in their personal life as well.
- Unnecessary worry
Kids are very impressionable and when they are in toxic families where anxiety is a part of everyday life, they pick up on that. This means that they constantly feel anxious and can’t stop themselves from worrying about things they don’t need to worry about.
This is because when they were children, they were constantly worried about the family atmosphere and simple everyday things. Thus this feeling stays with them forever and anxiety becomes a regular visitor.
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- Gaslighting and abuse raise real questions
As a member of a toxic family, your memories will differ from those of your parents. This means that a sad event will also be portrayed by your parents in a very happy and joyful way. It will make you think there is something wrong with your memory. As a result, you will start to question yourself and your identity. But beware of this.
What’s going on with you is just gaslighting. Now, in your parents’ version, life has always been perfect. Don’t let this be your copy. Stick with what you felt because you were there to feel it.
If you fail to commit to how you felt, you will fall into the trap of feeling like your very reality is under scrutiny. You will start to wonder what is real and what is not. The repercussions of this will be felt in your daily life and even in the way you understand the world.
- Relationships suffer
We don’t even realize this, but once someone goes through a negative family setting, they will be disfigured forever. The family is usually where we place our trust and faith for the first time. When we are not able to regain that trust and faith, the result is that we are too afraid to place that trust in anyone else.
Also, when we feel created by our family, we begin to feel like everyone around us is obligated to deceive us. It becomes very difficult to instill that trust in someone again. Consequently, all future relationships suffer. This applies not only to romantic relationships but also to friendships.
Thus, a toxic family will leave an indelible mark on a person’s mind. What can you do to reduce the pain?
- Talk to people or a therapist or anyone. Just talk about it.
- Focus more on yourself and your goals.
- Count what has been bestowed upon you. If you don’t have the love, shelter, and comfort that family provides, you will certainly have something else.
- Put yourself out of the world. more. This will help you deal with your problems better.
- Trust more.
- Collect all the love you get and celebrate it. You will get love, don’t worry.
Have faith - Don’t become all negative. Stay calm and positive. Look on the bright side of things.
- Also try to delete bad memories and not immerse yourself in alcohol. The only way to delete bad memories is to create new ones. happy.
- Love and laugh like there is no tomorrow.
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