Dealing with a narcissist can feel like you’re stuck on an emotional rollercoaster. You never know when the ride will be smooth or when it will take a wild, painful plunge. Narcissists are masters of manipulation and control, often leaving you feeling confused, drained, and doubting yourself. But here’s the kicker: It doesn’t have to be that way. There are certain behaviors and things you might do that give them more power over you.
So before you end up losing yourself completely, here’s a guide to 30 things you should stop doing with a narcissist. They may not be easy, but trust me, they’ll save you from the emotional chaos that comes with trying to fix a broken system.
- Stop Apologizing When You’re Not Wrong
Narcissists thrive on making you feel guilty, even for things you didn’t do. They twist situations so that it seems like you’re always at fault. Break out of this cycle—apologize only when you really have to. - Stop Over-Explaining Yourself
You don’t need to justify every little action, decision, or idea. Narcissists love to twist words and make you doubt your reality. Keep things short and clear and don’t give them ammunition to use against you. - Stop Trying to Fix Them
News flash: They’re not broken. They just don’t want to change. No matter how hard you try, a narcissist is unlikely to improve because they don’t see the need to. Don’t waste your energy trying to fix someone who doesn’t care about fixing. - Stop Giving Them the Benefit of the Doubt
Narcissists are great at playing the victim. They’ll make you think they don’t understand, but don’t be fooled. Stop giving them opportunities that you wouldn’t give anyone else. - Stop Ignoring Your Own Needs
Narcissists have a way of making everything about them. But in doing so, they drain you emotionally. Pay attention to your needs, desires, and mental health. They’re as important to them as they are to you. - Stop Believing Their Empty Promises
How many times have you heard “I’ll change” or “I’ll be better” only to have them fail you over and over again? They won’t change. A narcissist’s promises are like a house built on sand – here today, gone tomorrow.
Related : 25 Ways Narcissists Make You Believe You’re Their Only One
- Stop Getting Dragged Into Their Drama
Narcissists live for chaos. If they can cause chaos, they will. Don’t fall into their trap. Stay grounded and don’t indulge in unnecessary drama. - Stop Letting Them Play With Your Emotions
They play with emotions, and they will use your empathy against you. Learn to distance yourself from their emotional games. Your feelings are more important than their need for control. - Stop Giving Them Control Over Your Happiness
A narcissist will take your happiness away and feed off your frustration. They want to see you upset and insecure. Don’t give them that power. Find happiness in your own life, away from their poison. - Stop Trying to Get Their Approval
Their approval is a moving target. You will never be good enough for a narcissist because they can only see themselves as perfect. Stop seeking approval from someone who will never give it to you. - Stop Sacrificing Your Boundaries
Narcissists are experts at pushing boundaries until they break. It’s time to set clear lines and stick to them. Don’t let them do what you want. Stand up for yourself and don’t let their manipulation cross your personal boundaries. - Stop Ignoring Red Flags
It’s easy to justify their behavior, especially if you love them. But those red flags won’t go away. They flash warning signs for a reason. Trust your instincts and listen to the signals. - Stop Letting Them Manipulate You
Manipulation is a favorite tactic of narcissists. They will make you question your reality, but don’t fall for it. Stick to your truth and don’t let anyone rewrite your experiences. - Stop Thinking They’ll Change for You
They won’t. Narcissists won’t change because you love them or need them. Change has to come from within, and they simply aren’t interested in it. - Stop letting them take the lead in your relationship
Narcissists want to control everything. Stop letting them make all the decisions. Your relationship is a partnership, not a dictatorship.
- Stop Giving Them Unlimited Access to Your Time
Narcissists love attention. The more you give them, the more they take. Limit your time with them to conserve your energy and sanity. - Stop Allowing Them to Disrespect You
Narcissists will be disrespectful to you while convincing you that you deserve it. Never accept disrespect in any form. You deserve kindness, not cruelty. - Stop Playing Their Victim Story
Narcissists are adept at playing the victim, even when they are the ones causing the harm. Stop believing their sad stories. Their reality is not yours to fix. - Stop Allowing Them to Control Your Relationships
Narcissists will try to isolate you from friends, family, and anyone who might support you. Don’t let them cut you off. Your support network is crucial. - Stop Giving Them a Platform to Attack You
The more you interact with them, the more they will attack. Stop feeding their need to put you down. Keep your responses short, neutral, and to the point. - Stop Defending Them
You may find yourself justifying their bad behavior to others, but you don’t need to. Their actions speak for themselves. You don’t have to defend someone who doesn’t respect you constantly. - Stop Trying to Please Them
A narcissist will never be satisfied with anything you do. Stop bending over backwards to meet their impossible standards. It’s time to focus on your own happiness instead. - Stop Making Excuses for Their Actions
We all know that a narcissist can be charming when they need to be. Stop justifying their behavior because of their “charm” or “good intentions.” What they do is who they are. - Stop Living in Their Fantasy World
A narcissist creates a world where everything revolves around them. It’s easy to get lost in this illusion. Wake up. The world doesn’t bend to their whims. - Stop Letting Them Use Your Weaknesses Against You
They will always find a way to exploit your weaknesses. Keep your emotional defenses strong and don’t let them use your weaknesses as tools of control.
Related : 25 Reasons Why Narcissists Can’t Apologize (And Why It Affects You)
- Stop Thinking They’ll Love You the Way You Want
A narcissist only loves one person: themselves. Don’t expect one-sided love. You deserve a relationship built on mutual care and respect. - Stop Accepting Their Apologies
Their apologies are hollow. They’re just another way to regain control. Don’t fall for their empty words. Actions speak louder than apologies. - Stop Being Their Emotional Dumpster
They’ll take out their anger and frustration on you, but they never take responsibility. Don’t let them use you as a sounding board for their negativity. You’re not their emotional punching bag. - Stop Trying to Keep the Peace
There is no peace with narcissists. Every time you try to make peace, they’ll create chaos. Let go of that futile effort and prioritize your peace instead. - Stop Letting Them Define Your Worth
The most toxic thing you can do is let a narcissist define your worth. You are enough as you are. Their opinion of you does not define your self-worth.
Related ; 15 Ways Narcissistic Men Make Women Feel Guilty for Setting Boundaries (And Why It’s Abuse)
While these steps may seem harsh, they are necessary if you want to protect yourself from the emotional toll of a narcissistic relationship. It’s hard to break free, but it’s the first step toward reclaiming your life, peace, and sanity. You deserve better than manipulation and control. Let it go, and you’ll find the strength to move on.