We know that narcissists are selfish, arrogant, and manipulative. But would you recognize one if you met them? It may be harder than you think—their self-presentation can easily draw someone in. Here are three ways to spot a narcissist, backed by science:
Appearance. Narcissists like to look good—and they prefer to present themselves in eye-catching ways. These individuals often have a neat, well-groomed presentation, which requires a great deal of preparation (note that female narcissists wear makeup and show off their chest). The clothes themselves tend to be expensive and flashy. Take, for example, a study in which participants were shown photos of individuals whose personalities, including levels of narcissism, were rated. Observers were able to make quick, accurate judgments about narcissism based on appearance alone. According to the researchers, the association between narcissism and vanity, exhibitionism, and status-seeking factors is reflected in how narcissists choose to present themselves.
Conversation. Narcissists tend to swear and use more sexual language than their peers. Consider a study that had participants wear a digital voice recorder with an external microphone for four consecutive days, from Friday afternoon through Tuesday night. The device recorded 30-second intervals every 12.5 minutes (or 4.8 recordings per hour), and the participants did not know when they were being recorded. The researchers then analyzed the audio recordings. What did they find? Narcissism was associated with increased use of profanity and sexual language, even when the use of these words to express anger was statistically controlled. Popularity. Everyone seems to love narcissists, despite their somewhat uncharitable traits. Part of this is because they are charming. In one study, researchers had first-year psychology students sit in random seats, then asked them to step forward and briefly introduce themselves to their classmates. These presentations were videotaped, and lasted an average of 7.49 seconds. Immediately after each presentation, the participants were rated by other students. The researchers found that the narcissists in the group presented themselves in more elegant and attractive ways, had more attractive facial expressions, more confident body language, and were more cheerful. But crucially, the researchers say, the signals the narcissists in this sample displayed were judged positively by peers they had never met.
