Narcissists can be very annoying. If you’re mired in a relationship with one of them, you may feel like you don’t exist anymore because you can barely excuse yourself from going to the bathroom without a bill being passed in Congress. Not to mention, if your narcissist is outspoken, you’re forced to deal with tantrums that make a two-year-old look like a Zen master.
Every day, readers all over the world find my site by searching for “how to make a narcissist leave you alone”. While I don’t know each person’s unique circumstances, what I do know is how to get rid of a narcissist. Below, I share three effective strategies in hopes that you too will become drug-free and regain your ability to speak in complete sentences.
- No connection
There is no way to get around this. In most cases, the outspoken Narc will not leave you alone because you left the lines of communication open. In this case, you’ll need to be the one to block them because they probably won’t block themselves, unless it becomes an absolute bin situation with no money, no resources, and no hint of emotion. In short, unless you become a zombie. After all, even a negative display is better than nothing in the narcissist’s mind. They’ve been known to check in just to incite a nuclear meltdown, only to hang up feeling refreshed and invigorated. Why leave yourself open to that?
Even if they find a new source, they usually can’t resist knowing that they still have power over you. So, while you’re sitting white-clad at your phone, waiting for them to text you (it’s been three weeks since your last), they might as well text you a “hello” just to see what your reaction will be. It doesn’t mean they were looking at engagement rings or anything, it just means their new provider is at work and they can’t talk on the phone, but Narc needs to feed their egos with a little snack.
Starving their egos will force them to find another source of supply. You can do this by going to No Contact.
- Show no emotion
Daffodils are persistent little creatures. Sometimes, even when confronted with a “no call,” they don’t think you mean it, so they may feel inclined to “assuage your fears” by showing up at your favorite coffee shop, even though it’s 25 miles from their way. In this case, you will need to reward their efforts by pretending that you don’t see them. This may result in them coming (uninvited) to your table. Until then, they weren’t there!
They count on the advantage of being in a public place… where they believe you’ll have no choice but to acknowledge their existence. When they strike up a conversation, they assume the position of one of the adjacent chairs, remaining completely indifferent to Narc’s presence.
If they haven’t taken the hint yet, pick up your coffee, walk out of the coffee shop, and continue to get in your car and drive away. Kind of like one of the characters in The Seventh Sense who can’t see the dead. Narc will start to wonder if he’s imagining the entire interaction, which equals instant karma for all attempts at gaslighting. fist bump
This can be uncomfortable for empathetic people, or those who don’t like conflict, but it’s important to remember why you were forced to act in this way.
- Suppose you have Tourette’s syndrome
This is especially effective if you were submissive and quiet during the relationship. If you find yourself forced into conversation with the narcissist, hurl some unexpected obscenities, at volumes louder than the rest of your response. It might look like this:
