Narcissists love what you give them; they cause you pain and suffering.
Need.
Tears.
Fear.
Pleading.
People-pleasing.
What if all of this stopped?
What if you chose to live as you deserve? What would that look like, and how would it affect the narcissist?
Well… I promise you a comprehensive overview of the disturbing behavior…
…and it won’t be from you.
Wanting To Stir Their Fears
Narcissists are insecure…
What a shock!
They don’t want you to know, but I’m telling you because it’s good to know.
Stirring up these fears is the only way to make a narcissist feel unsettled.
Related : 15 Things That Are Emotionally Abusive
If you decide today to surprise them or leave them confused, you need several ways to do it, right?
Good thing you’re here!
12 Ways to Destabilize Narcissists
- Don’t Give Up on Your Truth
Your truth exists for a reason; you believe it because it matters to you. Not only that, but your truth can be based on what you’ve literally said, heard, seen, or felt.
Yes, narcissists can convince you that you didn’t see what you saw!
It’s disconcerting when a narcissist confronts someone else’s determination. If that happens, you’ll never see someone back down from you as quickly as you think they did.
Eventually, your truth will prevail, but giving up on it means it will take longer.
Hold on to what you know is true.
- Don’t Give It a Dangerous F*ck
When you show that something bothers you, a narcissist will take advantage. They may repeat the process just to see you again, or they may mock it for years to come so you never forget how it felt.
It’s time to unleash your sense of calm!
Not being bothered proves that your mood is unchangeable or unalterable. It also means you’re not giving them the support they want and need from you.
I can’t promise it’ll be easy not to show how upset you are, but that doesn’t mean you won’t be on the inside.
Related : This is What You Tell People Who Don’t Believe You Were Abused By a Narcissist
You have to start somewhere, right?
- Power and Authority Never Fades
Don’t Turn Off Your Light!
I don’t want to sound like a painting you might find in a department store—but it’s true.
Behind your light lies a special power that keeps you thinking for yourself and empowers you in difficult times.
Losing it means giving away a part of yourself to someone who will take advantage of it.
Keeping it there disarms them and makes them anxious.
- Shut Down, Say Nothing
When they’re expecting your words, your voice, your speeches, offer them nothing.
Let them feel the awkward silence as you hold back and refuse to give your thoughts time.
Keep them on their toes.
Don’t let them think you’ll give them anything.
They don’t deserve it.
- Live Your Best Life
The best revenge is to live a good life.
When a narcissist wants to upset you, they also want to see your life fall apart.
Related : 8 Reasons Narcissists Can’t See Their Abusive Acts as Evil
They love watching people surround them before they devour them—but that doesn’t have to be you!
Live a better life and prove to the narcissist that they’re capable and won’t bring you down.
- Lift Yourself Up—Don’t Get Involved in Conflicts
When a conflict draws you toward it like a magnet, reject it.
Pull yourself up high until you’ve overcome the conflict. It’s not a part of you, and you don’t want to be involved in it.
Gossip is for those who don’t know what better to do, and conflict only ends one way—so walk away.
Watch the narcissist struggle to understand how you can simply turn a blind eye.
- Be more independent than ever
Narcissists hate your ability to do things on your own—so the more you do it, the more anxious they feel.
Why?
Because they want to feel needed! They need a purpose so they can complain about it to others!
If you don’t need them, you don’t owe them anything. Avoid their emotional demands.
- Let it slide
Ignoring their narcissistic behavior seems so easy!
Over time, you’ll find this gets easier, and over time, the narcissist’s frustration increases because you don’t let them bother you.
Related ; What to Do When The Narcissist Spreads Lies About You
Once you start seeing their games as childish and pathetic, you take away a lot of their power. Once you reach this stage, it becomes almost enjoyable to watch their tactics fail and fail—just as a narcissist should!
- Walk Away
Distance creates room for guesswork. If narcissists aren’t deeply involved in your life, they’ll forever wonder what it’s like.
Staying away, even for a moment, while offering the bare minimum, will activate that sense of “mystery.”
What are they doing now? How will they manipulate you if they don’t even know you?
Narcissists feel extremely anxious when they’re not up to date on the latest news or rumors. They have nothing to draw from, and therefore nothing to feed themselves.
If you walk away, you’re consciously leaving the drama they want to perpetuate.
That’s a very powerful message to send to an unsure recipient.
- Don’t fall victim to bullying tactics—even if it hurts.
Narcissists, above all else, are bullies!
They’ll force you to believe certain things, or force you to do things you don’t want to. They’re so controlling that you feel lost before you even begin.
When they try to upset you and be mean to you, imagine what it would be like if you were in school. The advice you’ll receive is to ignore them; they’ll eventually get bored and stop.
Related : Devastating Mistakes I Made When Divorcing a Narcissist
Let them try their luck, but know that you’re not there to take their bullying bait.
- Ban them from your social media accounts
Oh, this is a big deal.
Your social media accounts are where you post everything.
What’s going on in your life?
Where did you have dinner?
Your vacation photos?
Happy news.
Sad news.
Memories.
Thoughts.
Opinions.
Likes.
Dislikes.
And why? For a narcissist to capture every detail about you and control every opportunity?
No way!
Related : How Do You Know If A Narcissist Is Gone For Good?
Keep them off your social media accounts so they can guess exactly what you’re up to. Without a clue, they’ll go crazy not knowing.
- Keep your news to a select few
Don’t tell everyone everything—even the really good news.
You have a select few who trust you, and that’s very noble.
Let’s not beat around the bush.
The narcissist will infiltrate your good news, as well as your bad, like a virus that knows no bounds.
They’ll tear apart your happiness and highlight the bad just to make it stand out.
Most often, they want to know everything because they feel it’s their right.
Don’t let them—and watch them writhe!
