If you’re anything like me, you hate drama, especially when it occurs in your relationship.
If you want to prevent this from happening to you, there are some glaring red flags you should know.
From attention-seeking to gossip, anxiety, and even vandalism, drama addicts have some creative outlets to be aware of.
1) They have a constant need for attention
Let’s start with the obvious. Drama means attention. They get attention and validation from their partner by creating or escalating conflicts and drama.
Exaggerating stories or playing the victim are some easy ways to get attention and sympathy from a partner.
Does this sound familiar to you?
I know some people who like to embellish details, make up events, or manipulate facts to make their stories more interesting and engaging.
Some even adopt the role of the victim to elicit sympathy and concern from their partners who feel compelled to comfort and support them.
Unfortunately, many nights on the town were ruined by this behaviour. They just spoil the experience for the whole group of people they work with.
2) They thrive on chaos
Do you know what the archenemy of drama addicts is? Quiet and peaceful attitudes. They can’t stand them.
They feel so uncomfortable that they stir up or incite conflicts to maintain a sense of excitement and intensity in their relationship.
Some people thrive on chaos because they believe intense emotional experiences and conflicts validate the strength or importance of their relationship.
They interpret the presence of drama as evidence of an emotional and meaningful relationship, even if it is ultimately unhealthy or unsustainable.
Basically, they equate drama with emotion.
Others feel a sense of power, dominance, or control over their partner’s feelings, actions, or decisions.
Whatever the underlying cause, chaos is harmful and stressful for both parties.
3) They are incredibly jealous
We’ve come this far without talking about jealousy. I think some healthy dose of jealousy is acceptable in healthy relationships. It can also be fun.
On the flip side, excessive jealousy is a no-brainer. Drama addicts in their relationships often display extreme jealousy, even in situations where there is little reason to be suspicious or insecure.
They also use it as a tool to create drama and maintain control over the relationship.
They love to create drama by accusing their partner of cheating, flirting with others, or not giving them enough attention. All in an effort to ensure that their partner stays focused on them.
I find this kind of behavior simply disgusting.
4) They make drama out of nothing
Making drama out of nothing is another specialty of drama addicts. They can blow minor issues out of proportion or interpret innocent actions or words as deliberate insults or insults, which leads to unnecessary drama.
I will say they start to act like typical Karen’s.
But not only that. The individuals who create drama are also serious snowflakes. They have increased their sensitivity to criticism.
They interpret neutral or constructive remarks as personal attacks, triggering defensive reactions and escalating minor issues into full-blown conflicts.
I mean, there are countless videos of this happening, and I have to say, they make my blood boil.
5) They’re on an emotional roller coaster
An emotional rollercoaster in a relationship is characterized by frequent and intense emotional swings, leading to intense highs and lows.
There is no middle ground as this is obviously too quiet for drama queens, as I mentioned above.
There are many high-profile relationships that come to mind when thinking of an emotional roller coaster.
It involved a great deal of drama, intense emotional experiences and, at times, tumultuous endings.
Older people will remember that Elizabeth Taylor was married to Richard Burton twice, and their relationship was known for its explosive nature.
Somewhat older people will also remember Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love. These rock stars had a wild relationship, marked by drug use and public scandals. We all know how that ended.
There is also Amy Winehouse, Blake Fielder-Civil, Rihanna, Chris Brown, Whitney Houston, Bobby Brown, Tina, Ike Turner and many others like them.
6) They feel uncomfortable or anxious
Drama addicts have trouble accepting stability and routine in their relationships. This is why they are constantly looking for change or new sources of excitement, which can contribute to an ongoing cycle of drama.
They simply feel uncomfortable or restless when their relationship is calm and stable, effectively disrupting the peace and creating drama to restore a sense of intimacy.
Fear of boredom, intimacy, vulnerability, and self-sabotaging patterns, as well as the need for control and power can all be potential primary factors for creating drama in peacetime.
Of course, the problem is much deeper than that, and one of the best solutions is to get professional help or advice that can provide insights.
7) They often gossip
When someone frequently blabs about their relationship issues or involves others in their drama, it has many underlying triggers and consequences.
For example, they seek validation and sympathy from friends and family.
By presenting their side of the story to others, they are looking for reassurance that they are not solely responsible for the problems in the relationship, alleviating the need to take personal responsibility.
This behavior can also inadvertently escalate conflicts. By seeking validation or sympathy from others, they often receive advice or encouragement to confront their partner or take actions that further contribute to the drama and worsen existing problems.
Not to mention, constantly involving others in relationship drama is a breach of privacy and trust in the relationship.
In addition, sharing intimate details with friends or family members violates the trust and confidentiality expected in a partnership, further damaging the trust and intimacy between partners.
8) They jump to conclusions
Don’t you just hate it when someone jumps to conclusions? It’s even worse when the person you’re with does.
A person who is addicted to drama in their relationship often tends to jump to conclusions and assume that their partner’s actions or behaviors are intentionally hurtful or betrayal without considering alternative explanations.
They may have heightened suspicion or mistrust, leading them to immediately interpret their partners’ actions in the worst possible light.
In other cases, this behavior stems from a deep-rooted insecurity. For example, unresolved issues from past relationships or personal experiences that left them feeling vulnerable and suspicious.
Whatever the reason, it must be dealt with because it is unfair to the other person.
9) They can’t set boundaries
Personal boundaries are incredibly important to our independence, healthy balance, personal growth, and self-care.
Partners who struggle with boundary setting may lack clarity about their needs, values, and boundaries within the relationship.
Failure to set and maintain clear, healthy boundaries can lead to blurred lines and misunderstandings and increase the potential for drama and conflict.
In every relationship that includes mature partners, boundaries will be respected and not crossed.
10) They feed on other people’s drama
People who are addicted to drama in their relationships don’t just stop there. They are obsessed with other people’s dramas, too.
They consume and obsess over media, books, or movies about wild and tumultuous relationships, using them to vicariously experience drama and fuel their addictions.
This, in turn, reinforces existing beliefs and perceptions about relationships. They begin to believe that drama and conflict are necessary aspects of love, and consuming media that aligns with these beliefs further solidifies their addiction to drama.
11) They spoil positive moments
Positive moments and experiences are something we live for. After the rain, the sun comes up, right?
This may not be the case for people who are stuck with partners who are addicted to drama, as they sometimes tend to undermine or sabotage positive experiences or milestones.
Again, there could be many reasons behind this. They may also feel uncomfortable with happily ever after and prefer a dynamic full of drama, as I mentioned above.
12) They love makeup
I’ve known couples who broke up and got back together a few times. As I think about them now, I’m pretty sure that one or both of the people in those relationships were addicted to drama and/or addicted to makeup.
Some people become so addicted to the intense emotional experiences that come with getting together after a fight that they continually seek the emotional rush to make it up instead of working on the underlying issues.
It’s definitely not a good place to be in a relationship, let alone get married. There is no hard and fast rule on how to break this cycle. It will take a lot of meditation, time and effort.
Most of the above signs of drama addiction point to a general lack of trust in a partner and the relationship itself.
They struggle with trust issues and may deliberately create drama to test their partner’s loyalty or commitment, which reinforces their negative beliefs about relationships.
