When you get to the point where:
You are 1 – Narcissist 0…
…it’s time to celebrate.
More than that, it’s time to reflect and see how you got to the point where you actually beat them.
Many victims think it’s impossible, but you’ve proven that it can be done.
So, what did you need to do to do this? How exactly did you beat them?
I have 11 signs that you did a good job at it…
Are you there yet?
Oh how I wish you were all here, right now! All this time spent under the control of a controlling narcissist has to stop at some point, and I truly hope it’s up to you to take control and say, “Enough!”
Related : 11 Reasons Why Women Stay With Abusive Men
It takes a lot of time and awareness to get to this point, and I know that you all have the power to overcome toxicity head-on.
HowItFeelWhenYouDefeatANarcissist
If you’re under the influence of someone who is extremely manipulative, how do you feel?
Do you feel empowered?
Do you feel relieved?
Do you feel scared?
Are you feeling uncertain?
Are you feeling anxious?
Are you feeling happy?
Are you feeling grateful?
Are you feeling free?
Are you feeling guilty?
None of these feelings are wrong – it’s a time of real mixed emotions and I can’t imagine any of them will be the only ones you’ll feel. We change as the days go by, and there’s no right or wrong.
11 Signs You’ve Beaten a Narcissist
- You Don’t Miss Them
So let’s take a look at all the ways you know you’ve beaten a narcissist.
It’s so nice to wake up every morning and not have to calm your aching heart.
The worst thing about missing someone is all the memories you’re ripping out of your mind to reinforce their absence. When that becomes your daily routine, life can be incredibly difficult.
Getting over a narcissist starts with the beautiful realization that you don’t really miss them anymore.
You don’t miss 5% of the good times versus 95% of the bad times. You don’t miss anything.
This also means a little more than that, as missing them is often related to the bond you had with them.
Feeling like you won’t let them go because of that “bond” will make you crave them for a very long time.
Now – it’s all over, and you feel more free!
- Start Rebuilding Your Life
Rebuilding your life after narcissistic abuse isn’t easy. Most people don’t even know where to start because all they’ve ever experienced is what they were told what to do and what not to do (either directly or indirectly).
Suddenly, you have a world open to you, and you’re responsible for how you fill it all. As hard as it may seem, starting to do it is how you know you’ve defeated the narcissist.
It takes courage to rebuild. It’s impressive to gather what’s left of your self-confidence and self-esteem to feel worthy enough to do it.
This is a huge step in defeating the narcissist.
- Goodbye Guilt
Guilt goes out the window the moment you start defeating the narcissist!
You will no longer sit there, afraid of what happened and feel bad about it.
No one is telling you to inject shame into your thoughts, opinions, or actions. You don’t have that dark cloud of manipulation hanging over your head.
And now? You own your choices. You don’t dwell on the past and feel bad about the results.
The only reason you felt guilty when you were with the narcissist is because he taught you how to take responsibility for his actions and behavior.
But none of that was you.
- Happiness Comes Back to You
Happiness will slowly start creeping back into your life when you defeat the narcissist. You will start enjoying everything again.
From music, to exercise, to baking, to watching your favorite shows, to seeing friends, to even enjoying work!
All the things the narcissist stopped you from doing or criticized you for will start coming back to you – and you will love it.
- Acceptance – It Is What It Is
Okay, okay – it’s a phrase that can divide people!
But the truth is – your past happened, and the person you thought was perfect turned into a narcissist.
You no longer dwell on it, wish it were different, regret it, or beat yourself up.
It is what it is.
Acceptance.
It happened, I can’t change it. I’m going to live my life now and close this chapter.
- You No Longer Feel Responsible
Why should you feel responsible? Their moods aren’t your problem, and they never were.
The difference now is that you are aware of it, and it immediately feels lighter than it was. Knowing that you are not responsible for the narcissist, how the relationship developed, or his behavior in general means that you can finally feel what it means to be free—and innocent!
- Don’t care to play
Games? Sure! You like board games or card games.
Narcissistic games? No thanks.
I’m done. I’ve been there, played these games without your knowledge for a while, and now I’m done.
You won’t be attracted or seduced, and nothing they say or do will make you want to be a part of them again.
- Vacuuming doesn’t work
Oh look, here comes the narcissist. He’s going to tell me he loves me. He’s going to tell me he can’t live without me. He’s going to apologize.
Related : 13 Painful Lessons You Need To Learn From Narcissists
Wait, what is this? New technology?
All of a sudden, they up their game. They show up at your job with flowers. They ask you to marry them. They book you a weekend away, all expenses paid.
But you?
No!
Don’t believe it. You’re not interested, and you see these gestures for what they are:
Empty ways to provoke you and start this cycle of abuse all over again.
- You Laugh Instead of Crying
Laughter is good for the soul, and you clearly missed out on a lot of that with the narcissist.
You find your laughter again when it comes to beating them up.
Crying was the way you coped before, and now you’re discovering a lighter passion for life.
What a way to prove that you can rise above it all!
- You’re Taking Care of Yourself
Have you started taking care of how you look and feel? Are you giving yourself opportunities to eat well instead of bad?
Have you started exercising, or doing something that boosts your happy hormones?
What about sleep? Making sure you get more of it, and better quality?
This is because you’ve overcome the narcissist, and you no longer have to listen to him try to put you down every day.
- He Turns to Someone Else
After the narcissist gets tired of trying to play games that no longer work, he will eventually tire of you and move on to a new source.
Be grateful if this happens. You’ve proven that he can’t get to you and he knows it about you too.
