Imagine a time when narcissists were honest!
Imagine a time when narcissists said what they really thought and felt!
Hooray—imagine? The world would continue as normal, but the narcissist’s world would fall apart!
Narcissists keep secrets and lie intentionally; they don’t do it just because they want to.
It’s important to understand why they lie by highlighting the things they would say if they were truly honest.
That’s where I come in!
Are Narcissists Ever Honest?!
Raise your hand if you’ve been with an honest narcissist.
Hello?
Is anyone…?
I didn’t think so.
Related : 11 Signs You Have Beaten The Narcissist
That’s because they thrive on a bed of lies, while you’re barely surviving.
Honesty Brings Truth
No narcissist wants to reveal the truth, which is why they can’t be honest.
The truth will make you leave, and then what?
They have no one to take their life away from!
Ten Things Narcissists Would Say If They Were Honest
- “I hate you!”
Look, no matter how much you refuse to admit it, a narcissist will love to tell you how much they honestly hate you.
They don’t love you for various reasons, but pretending can be a stretch.
Convincing you that they love you works hand in hand with their intermittent displays of affection.
When they revert to the discarding or devaluing stages of the abuse cycle, you wait for the next time you’re brought back to a state of false, loving security.
If they were completely honest, they would tell you they hate you.
Related : 11 Reasons Why Women Stay With Abusive Men
They don’t say it because they need you more than they’re willing to admit.
- “I’ve never loved you.”
You’ve heard it a million times, and they’ll get angry even if you say you don’t feel love for them.
I go out of my way to show you that I love you, and it’s never enough!
I offer myself for you, and you blame me!
I took you out on the town for a lavish weekend and a show, and you think I don’t love you?!
Narcissists think that showing love means spending money on something or simply telling you they love you.
People can use all the words they want, but unless they’re tied to love, respect, and loyalty, saying “I love you” means absolutely nothing.
If they had the chance to speak without lying, they’d tell you they never loved you. It was all an act to get something from you.
Yes, it hurts. It’s supposed to hurt.
- “You make me feel disgustingly jealous.”
Anything you have that a narcissist wants, they’ll be extremely jealous of.
A better job than theirs?
Are you in better physical shape than theirs?
Related : The Narcissist Eternally Suffers From These 6 Things
More confidence?
Do you have a natural zest for life?
Are you confident in yourself?
More money?
Sincere and compassionate charm?
All of these things will drive narcissists crazy.
Do you know how long they have to work to get even a fraction of what you just wrote, or how much they have to pretend to gain even a little respect from others?
Narcissists are always envious of people who are more successful in any aspect of their lives.
Instead of using a healthy, natural dose of envy to inspire them to follow a similar path, they feel compelled to destroy your happiness.
Narcissists ruin the best days and turn blue skies gray. Their presence can drain the energy of a space almost instantly.
If they were honest with you, they would admit it.
- “I don’t like one part of myself”
I wish I could hear a narcissist be brutally honest about this aspect of themselves, because anyone who knows them well knows they can’t stand it.
Hearing a narcissist say these things means they’re leaning into a very vulnerable side they’ve never shown anyone before.
This side of the narcissist will never be revealed because they’re too busy trying to pretend they’re perfect to make you doubt them.
Related : The Narcissist Wants You To Hate Them
They’re too busy denying reality—because it represents nothing but a problem they know they can’t solve.
- “I’m afraid of intimacy”
If you knew this about a narcissist, you’d know that all their rejection wasn’t because of you.
You should know this beforehand, but you won’t because they’ll make excuses or blame you for trying to be too demanding.
Eventually, you’ll convince yourself that this is true, and you’ll see a flaw in your relationship with them.
Narcissists fear intimacy. They hate the idea of sacrificing their heart and risking hurt.
Even though they love sex, they hate letting their guard down.
- “I’m not who you think I am.”
Ha! I mean. I’m laughing out loud as I write this because I imagine a narcissist with their head down, admitting they’re a narcissist.
If they were honest, they would say so.
But they’re not!
- “I study you to manipulate you.”
Watching you, sniffing out your fears, asking you questions that lead to your secrets—this is all about studying you and knowing you better than you think you know yourself.
Related : Why I Couldn’t Tell The Difference Between Love and Narcissistic Abuse
If you’d known this from the start, you wouldn’t have had to go through all the annoying, irritating situations they put you through.
- “I’m here to mess with you and ruin things for you!”
Run!
Run fast!
That’s what you’d do, right? You’d be out of there faster than if you’d just said “Red flag!”
But, in reality, they don’t make it easy for us. They stick around and dig deeper into our fears.
Their true reason for coming into your life has nothing to do with loving you or wanting to appreciate you forever. And while it’s painful to realize this, it hurts even more because you get angry about falling for these games.
- “Don’t believe a word I say.”
How many of you would survive if a narcissist said, “Look, you know what? I’m going to say something hurtful to you, but you shouldn’t believe it because it’s not true. It makes me feel better.”
- “I feel so insecure.”
They’ll drop this phrase on the floor afterward if they mutter it. Narcissists feel insecure, but you won’t find a single person who admits it.
Their insecurities are masked by bravado and cruelty. This will never change.
