Texting Mistakes: 8 Things No One Should Say In A Text


Have you ever sent a text message that you would like to recover? Or have you ever received a text that confused, hurt, or angered you? If you have, you may understand how texting can be a risky framework for building relationships.

Face-to-face is where relationships live and thrive, so, as a rule, try to save important things for face-to-face conversations.

Here are eight specific things to avoid when texting:

1 Complaints.

“I told you not to text me during the finals.” Or, “You should be nicer to my father.” Since the recipient can’t hear your voice, they have no idea how big the deal is for you. Does it require a breakup? Are you just a little upset? Or are you just playing?


2 Insults.

“I knew I could count on you to be late,” or “a typical male response.” Insults, like complaints, are no more fun to read than you should hear, and they can be confusing. Also, you may regret what you said later when you have more time to think about it. When it comes to negativity over texts, just don’t do it.

Texting Mistakes: 8 Things No One Should Say In A Text

3 Explanations and apologies.

“I was so tired, I wasn’t thinking properly.” “I thought you’d appreciate getting tickets early.” These interpretations may be too complex for the text. You will do yourself no favors by writing rather than speaking. Instead, try, “I owe you an apology. Can we meet tonight?” Then take all the time you want to say it in person.

4 Questions about the other person’s behavior.

“Why didn’t you text me yesterday?” or “Are you mad at me?” Give the person a chance to explain without relying on their thumb. Meet face to face, or at least voice-over, before asking the question.


5 Bombshells.

“I think we should see other people,” or “They found a lump.” Even big positive news like, “I think I love you,” is best dropped in person, or at least in real-time. Most people hate getting shells by texting, and they might not think much about doing so.

Texting Mistakes: 8 Things No One Should Say In A Text

6 Heavy topics.

Text messages were not intended as a substitute for serious conversations about heavy topics such as child custody issues, IRS audits, health issues, etc. Wait or create a face-to-face opportunity to discuss these matters.

7 Private information.

Credit card numbers and nude photos – anything you don’t want to see posted all over the internet – should also not be texted. Hackers can access your messages without your knowledge or permission.

8 Secrets.

“J. doesn’t know that M. and C. are dating behind the appearance of D. and N.” or “Betsy is like a klepto.” As mentioned above, always assume that your letter may end up before your wrong eyes. Avoid risks. Just don’t.


The Courage Not to Text

No matter how many posts you read about what not to send in a text message, you may end up writing things you shouldn’t. Why does this happen?

Many people are unsure how to handle difficult conversations personally. Texting provides a sense of safety and distance: you don’t have to look the other person’s eyes in the eye and know how to respond from moment to moment.

If that describes you, it might help to know that most of us have trouble with difficult conversations. Dealing with the matter flawlessly is not the point. The point is to show up and open up about getting a little lost with someone who matters to you.

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